Graduation - Madam Oz

Procrastination is no safe place for an active mind. I felt like a cliff jumper, standing a ledge, just dam side sexier then my competitors. I had tormented myself by having sold my soul to just about everyone barring the devil himself, but then again who knows. Names and Faces just slip into the background very quickly. Hello's and you were awesome are often met with blank stares.

I had a small band of girls, hand picked, not enough, my hearted wanted a release, but my professional attitude was telling me its time to jump, open the business, pinch your nose Ozzie, launch yourself into a pike position and hope the splash is good.

I was sitting on the concrete bridge railing, the water flowing gently beneath me, rhythmically tapping my nails on the rail, looking to my left into the main hall at Sinsity. A Part of me realises that it’s much easier sometimes to just dance in someones club, but that is road heading in the wrong direction for me.

I had battled insecurities, been called some of the darnedest names, may as well have them tattooed on my cute bum, some of them i deserved. Their is no halo above my head, and i do think my blood looks black. I look at the shiny poles reflecting the early morning sun and feel nostalgic, I had graduated. Sami had returned, she freely admitted she half expected to return only to find out I had committed suicide. In some of my more unbalanced moments it would have been so easy to do, the right mix of drugs and alcohol would be so easy.

Yet my last drug fuelled rage, the car on Wardour St, time in hospital and the departure from the Soho seemed too had changed me. It gave me the chance to stop look around notice all the people around me that actually care about my sanity.

I hop off the rail, walk gracefully toward the ramp leading up into the main hall, I realise, I have a club to open, I had my seven lessons, I have my friends, I have my Sami, and most of all I have myself.

Oz,x